


Reminiscent

by Hazzaandloubearforever



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angsty Schmoop, Future Mpreg, Heartbreak, M/M, Past Mpreg, it gets happier i promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2019-04-10
Packaged: 2019-05-08 14:34:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14696196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hazzaandloubearforever/pseuds/Hazzaandloubearforever
Summary: It's a Thursday when Harry sees him. He's just parked his black Jetta out in front of the supermarket when he sees a familiar face exiting the store hand in hand with a skinny brunette.Of course she's got long curly hair, Harry mutters to himself. Harry knows he's seen that woman before. Long before the wedding and long before the engagement party.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi peoples!
> 
> I'm back again with another! I know I have a few stories that are uncompleted but I'm working on all of them from time to time! I haven't abandoned any of them, I promise! Life has been kicking my ass lately and being an adult isn't so much fun when you're in school and work full time! As a small breakdown, I currently have two One Direction fanfics in the works as well as one Supernatural one, too, and will be uploading them as soon as I can!
> 
> For this story, I found it written on my notes on my iPhone and decided that my lovely fans deserved to read this one! This is only chapter 1! I'm having a bit of writer's block with this particular story, so if ANY of you have any ideas on how this story should play out, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not hesitate to send me a comment with your ideas! :D
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are welcomed! Xx

It's a Thursday when Harry sees him. He's just parked his black Jetta out in front of the supermarket when he sees a familiar face exiting the store hand in hand with a skinny brunette. _Of course she's got long curly hair_ , Harry mutters to himself. Harry knows he's seen that woman before. Long before the wedding and long before the engagement party.

Harry chews on his bottom lip as he debates whether or not to approach Louis or wait until he's out of the parking lot before leaving his car.

The woman laughs obnoxiously and playfully slaps Louis' chest, the gesture making Harry's stomach churn. That should be him slapping Louis' chest obnoxiously. That should be him hand in hand with a goofy grin on his face, hopelessly in love.

Only it's not him. His heart has been obliterated into little bite-size pieces and he doesn't think he'll ever recover.

_"You know I love you, Haz. Don't you love me?"_

_"Of course I do, Lou!" Harry croaks, fighting back the tears. "You promised us forever, remember? What happened to 'you jump, I jump?' One little remark from your family and you go and propose to that little whore!"_

_"Don't call her that," Louis snaps. "She's not a whore. We've known each other forever--_

_"You've known /me/ forever, Louis."_

_Louis pinches the bridge of his nose and turns his back to Harry, staring at the water stained wall of Harry's flat. "I've gotta go."_

_"Louis, no, please," Harry begs, the tears finally spilling over. "Stay. Stay with me. I can be what you want. I can love you more than her. All those nights of love making didn't mean anything to you!?"_

_Louis chokes on his words as he whips around to stare at Harry. He's startled at the tears trekking down his ex-lover's face. It's destroying him to do this to Harry. "It was never love making, Harry. They were mindless fucks."_

_Harry's gasps at those words, unable to seek out a response. Louis' out the door before Harry can register. Out the door went his heart. Out the door went the only person he’ll ever love. Out the door was his entire life._

Harry decides to get out. It's been 4 years since the wedding and he's quite certain that Louis' forgotten all about him. Only he's definitely wrong when he hears the familiar voice call out his name.

He whips around to see bright blue eyes and a crooked smile. _His_ crooked smile. “Louis, hi. How’s it going? Been awhile, yeah?”

Louis smile falters a bit and Harry does his best not to cry right in the parking lot. It’s been _four years_. He should be over the heartbreak by now. Only he’s not because every memory they ever had came rushing back like frigid water being poured over his entire body. Fuck, why did he get out of his car? He should have waited until Louis was well out of the vicinity. Instead, Harry’s standing here looking awkward as hell, pigeon toed and all as Louis holds his wife’s hand with his own and groceries in the other.

“Good, mate. Elle, this is Harry. We went to high school together,” Louis introduces and Harry bites his lip at the stab of pain in his chest. _Went to high school together. Yes, Elle, we also were boyfriends who fucked every chance we could._

“Yes, I remember!” She chirps. “You were at our wedding. How have you been?”

_Dying inside._ “I’ve been great, Elle, and I see Louis’s treating you well.”

“Oh, he’s just the most incredible man in the universe,” Elle gushes and Harry wants to vomit. “Just the best husband in the world.” Elle punctuates her sentence with a peck to Louis’s cheek whose face goes red at the affection.

“I bet. Louis was just the same in high school. It was nice catching up but I’ve got to get back. Ainsley’s babysitter has plans tonight.” Harry mentally slaps himself for blabbering out unnecessary information.

Louis furrows his brows. “Ainsley?”

Harry tenses but tries to be discreet about it and tries not to sigh. “My daughter,” Harry finally answers. “Ainsley Lillian Styles.”

Louis’s breathing hitches but it’s so faint it goes unnoticed. Only Harry knows Louis—has known him since they were children so he catches it and for a moment he wishes he hadn’t. He’s just opened Pandora’s box. Harry knows he’s over analyzing Louis’s body language but could he be onto something? Then again, this could all be in Harry’s head. It’s been four fucking years. Louis is _married._ He has the perfect apple pie life; married to a pretty brunette who Harry’s certain comes from a wealthy background if the wedding was anything to go by. Louis has it all—has everything Harry could never give him.

“You have a daughter?” Louis squeaks and quickly clears his throat.

Harry simply nods. “I do, she’s four and definitely gives me a run for my money. It was great seeing you both again but I’ve really got to go.”

“It was nice seeing you again,” Elle says before tugging Louis toward their unneccessarily expensive car. Harry heads toward the double doors of the store and chances a glance over his shoulder, catching Louis staring wide eyed at him as he distractedly puts the groceries into the trunk. Harry shrugs at Louis and offers a small smile before disappearing into the store.

***

Harry makes it home a quarter to seven and Kelly, Ainsley’s babysitter is lying on the couch watching some reality show where girls are screaming at each other and throwing kitchenware across the room.

“Hey, Kelly, How was she?”

“Fun as always,” she giggles, turning off the tv and standing from her spot on the couch. She tidies up the living room a bit before slipping on her shoes and grabbing her coat.

“She wasn’t too much trouble, right? I know she can be a bit of a diva sometimes,” Harry remarks, handing Kelly a few folded bills.

“No, not at all, Mr. Styles. We colored and played tea party. She had Mac n’ cheese for dinner and finally fell asleep in her room.

Harry rolls his eyes at the formalities. “I’ve told you a dozen times, Kelly, call me Harry. Mr. Styles is too formal.”

“Right, sorry, just habit. Do you need me tomorrow?”

Harry shakes his head. “I have the next two days off so I’ll need you on Sunday.” Harry walks Kelly to the door and sees her out, closing the worn wooden door. He double locks the door and cleans up his tiny kitchen before peaking into Ainsley’s room, smiling at the little girl wrapped up like a burrito in her princess bed snoring softly.

Harry’s heart melts every time he sees that precious girl. Her little button nose and bow lips would make anyone fall in love with her. It’s Ainsley’s blue eyes and soft brown hair that sold Harry. When she was first placed on his chest four years ago, baby doll eyes wide and dazed trying to figure out her surroundings, Harry knew his entire world changed for the better.

Harry quietly steps into the room and bends down to kiss her little forehead, whispering sentiments before closing the door and heading to his bedroom. He scrubs his hands down his face and lets out a sigh at the remnants of today. All he wanted to do was go to the grocery store after work, pick up a few items and go home to his daughter. Instead, Harry’s been slapped in the face with painful memories and the sight of Louis hanging off some female’s shoulder looking so hopelessly in love with her.

Harry doesn’t even know where to begin with all of this. If he ponders it any further he’s going to put himself into a fit and he’s not sure if he’ll be able to recuperate from it. He was just getting a hold on life, working double shifts at the nearby diner to make sure his daughter was taken care of, starting to take an interest in dating again, and all in all, _finally_ getting over Louis.

Harry’s just stripping down for the night, ready for comfy clothes and binge watching when his phone goes off. Harry’s quick to silence it, pausing to listen for any movement in Ainsley’s room. He sighs in relief when the flat is still quiet and answers the phone without looking at the caller ID.

“Hello?”

“Harry.” It’s him. _His_ voice. The one he’s been trying to get out of his head for the past four years.

“Louis,” Harry chokes.

“Is this a bad time?”

“N-no, I was just getting ready for bed.”

“Oh, Alright. Listen uh.....how are you?”

Harry sighs because he doesn’t have the strength nor the emotional capacity to handle this. “Why don’t you just spit it out, Louis?”

“Is she mine?”

Harry hesitated, inhales deeply before he lets out the breath shakily. “Yes.”

“Fuck.”

“Well don’t sound so upset,” Harry says sardonically.

“Harry, stop that,” Louis admonishes.

“Stop What, Louis? Jesus, you haven’t seen me in four years and then we run into each other at the store and suddenly you want back in my life? I was _just_ getting over you and then boom! You come crashing back into my life. But I won’t have it, Louis, I won’t.”

“Haz—

“Don’t you dare call me that!”

There’s a slight pause on Louis’ end. “Harry. Can I....at least meet her?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Why? She’s mine too.”

Harry blood is boiling the further this conversation goes. Who is Louis to demand to see Ainsley? For four years he raised that little girl on his own and suddenly Louis wants to see her? The first five years of a child’s life is crucial to their development and adding another random face to the mix could jeopardize her development.

“Fuck you!” Harry hisses. “She’s not yours! You decided to sell out! One little hardship and you marry the first bird you fucking see! You panicked and you sold out. So much for gay pride.”

“Harry...”

“Don’t. Just don’t.” Harry hears the rustling of blankets from Ainsley’s room and Harry mentally curses because his yelling probably woke her up. “I have to go.”

“Harry, wait—

“Please don’t call again. Goodbye, Louis.” Harry ends the call, tosses his phone on the bed and goes to tend to his daughter.

It takes half an hour to get Ainsley back to sleep and Harry’s exhausted. Both physically and mentally. That phone call took a lot out of him and the entire time he fought the tears--fought against the memories trying to resurface. Harry refuses to rekindle those memories—go back to sleepless nights of lovemaking and giddy laughter and just being _in love._

But all that’s gone now.

Harry’s a parent now. He has responsibilities. He can’t even remember the last time he went on a date. His entire world revolves around Ainsley now and he’s not going to let Louis fuck it up.

Louis’ stalker-like tendencies start the beginning of the following week. Louis practically spams Harry’s phone with calls and messages and Harry’s reached the point of wanting to block him, but then again if the roles were reversed, perhaps he would be doing the same thing. It isn’t that Harry is ignoring Louis per se, but he just doesn’t know what to say to him. He drops the bombshell that he’s Ainsley’s other father and then requests he never call back. 

Truth is, Harry’s at a standstill. He doesn’t know _what_ to do. Does he finally respond to Louis? Does he allow Louis to meet his daughter? Or does he continue to ignore him and try to get on with his life?

All that comes to a head when Harry arrives at Ainsley’s preschool and Louis is sitting on a bench near the entrance. Harry tenses, tries to pretend that he doesn’t see the man who used to be the love of his life as he takes a deep breath and keeps his head down.

“I know you saw me, Haz,” Louis speaks. 

Harry lets out the breath he’s been holding and finally turns his attention to Louis. “What are you doing here, Louis? How do you even know Ainsley goes here?”

“I called your mum.”

“What!” Harry exclaims. “You had no right to call her and she had no right to tell you where Ainsley goes to school. Why the hell are you even here? Don’t you have your _wife_ to go back to?”

Louis flinches at the way Harry says wife, like it’s poison on his tongue. He stands, putting his hands up in defense. “You’re right, I didn’t, but you weren’t responding to any of my messages or calls--

\--then you should have got the hint!” Harry spits.

“Harry…”

Harry puts his hand up to stop Louis from continuing and shakes his head. “Stop, okay? Just stop. I don’t want to hear it. You think you can just waltz back into my life, Ainsley’s too? After four years? Are you mental?”

“No, but--

\--but nothing, Louis! I’ve washed my hands with you. You walked out on me four years ago because you were a fucking coward. You married Elle because you were afraid of what people thought and then you discover that our one last intimate moment together resulted in something more and you think we can put the past behind us and everything would be go back to the way it used to be?”

Louis purses his lips, trying to decide what the correct response should be to somewhat alleviate this stressful situation. “I should have never hurt you and I’m sorry.. It wasn’t intentional. You don’t think it killed me to break up with you? You were the love of my life.”

“Bullshit,” Harry spits. “If I was the love of your life you should have grown some balls and told your family to fuck off.” Louis flinches at the harshness to Harry’s tone and Harry fights the urge to roll his eyes. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go pick up _my_ daughter.” 

Harry pushes past Louis and enters the dilapidated building. A part of Harry wants to turn around and use this opportunity to start over but he and Louis both know that could never happen. Even if the two could kiss and make up, there was Louis’ family he had to deal with as well as divorcing Elle and that was an entire issue in its own. 

“Harry, wait!” Louis calls. Harry sighs in annoyance and turns around, giving Louis his attention. “Can we...at least grab coffee sometime? Please?”

Harry bounces his knee impatiently, chewing on his bottom lip as he ponders Louis’ request. What’s one coffee meeting? It couldn’t hurt right? With a sigh, Harry finally nods. “Fine. We can have coffee. Tomorrow morning at Rise N’ Grind, seven o’clock, don’t be late.”

Harry didn’t give Louis a chance to respond before he’s traipsing into Ainsley’s preschool to retrieve his daughter. Harry fights the urge to glance over his shoulder-- to see if Louis looks as crushed as Harry’s felt for the past four years but decides against it when the polite woman with a pixie cut greets Harry.

“Hi, Mr. Styles, here to pick up Ainsley?”

“Hi, Debbie,” Harry greets with a nod. “I am. Was she good today?”

“As always,” Debbie chirps. “She’s such a sweetheart! Always wanting to help and include everyone. I’d say she takes after her father.”

Harry blushes and focuses on scrawling his name on the sign-out sheet while Debbie retrieves his daughter. He goes over to the little cubby and grabs Ainsley’s Hello Kitty lunchbox and sweater just as Debbie comes out of the room with Ainsley on her hip.

“Hey, princess!” Harry beams and thanks Debbie as she sets Ainsley down. Harry helps Ainsley into her jacket and fastens the bright pink beanie over her mop of curls. “Ms. Debbie said you were a good girl today.”

“Uh huh,” Ainsley says with a cheek splitting grin that could rival Harry’s.

At least she’s got Harry’s smile. He’s grateful for that. Everything else, though, is all Louis. As she got older, her features were mirroring Louis’ more and more it was bittersweet. Just because she looked like her other father didn’t mean he’d love Ainsley any less, it just broke his heart to see her little antics because they’d remind Harry so much of Louis--so much of the man he thought was his forever.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry shouldn’t be this nervous; sitting in his beat up Jetta at six forty-five in the morning, a mere fifteen minutes before his coffee date--can it even be called a date? It’s just coffee with an old friend, right? An old friend he used to be in love with who also so happens to be the father of his four year old.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Le Gasp* What's this? 2 updates in one day?! OH YEAH!!
> 
> Enjoy the chapter, I know I enjoyed writing it! I'm not sure how many chapters I plan to write with this fic. I'll go where my mind will take me!
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are welcome!

Harry shouldn’t be this nervous; sitting in his beat up Jetta at six forty-five in the morning, a mere fifteen minutes before his coffee date--can it even be called a date? It’s just coffee with an old friend, right? An old friend he used to be in love with who also so happens to be the father of his four year old.

“Fuck, what am I doing?” Harry says aloud, dropping his head to the steering wheel as he takes a few deep breaths. What is he hoping for exactly? Deep down Harry secretly wishes he and Louis can fall back into comfortable territory and start over but there’s a few issues that need resolving before that can even be considered an option.

A light tapping on his driver window startles Harry out of his thoughts and he quickly sits up, eyes wide and a bit frantic. His heart rate slows a bit when he sees Louis’ face smiling through the glass and gives a little wave at the shorter male. He quickly turns off his car and steps out, wiping invisible dirt off his pant legs; an antic he found himself doing whenever he felt awkward or was put in an uncomfortable situation.

“You okay there?” Louis asks with a laugh, clearly eying Harry’s figure.

“Uh, yeah, just scared me is all,” Harry fumbles to say.

“Still a spaz, I see.”

“Am not!” Harry defends, taking offense.

“If you say so, Haz. C’mon, it’s cold out ‘ere.” Louis leads the way into Rise N’ Grind, finding a small table toward the back of the little cafe. “Coffee? Extra cream, two sugars with a shot of espresso?” 

“You remembered?”

Louis smiles sheepishly. “‘Course I do. You always ordered that when we were together.”

Harry raises a brow and crosses his arms over his chest. “You think we can just fall back into old habits, Louis?” Harry bites. And okay, maybe he shouldn’t be so curt but he doesn’t want to give Louis false hope.

“No?” Louis quickly answers. “We were together forever, or so it felt like, so forgive me if I remember the way you take your coffee.”

Harry sighs and reaches out to place his hand on Louis’ shoulder. “I’m sorry, I’m being an arse.”

Louis smiles genuinely and it makes Harry feel fuzzy inside. After all these years, Louis still manages to turn Harry into goo. 

“Baby steps, right?” Louis comments.

“Baby steps,” Harry agrees.

Louis purses his lips as he awkwardly scratches at the back of his neck. “Right. So, coffee! Be right back.” The shorter male hurries away and gets in line.

Harry’s eyes follow Louis’ movements and they eventually land on his arse. He chews on his bottom lip as he remembers constantly groping and fondling that bum every chance he got when they were together. His touching may or may not have gotten the past lovebirds into trouble a time or two. If Harry wasn’t careful, he could find himself in a sticky situation again. Old habits die hard after all.

Harry needs to get himself together. He agreed to this coffee date--again, can it even be considered a date?--to hopefully amend the situation or at least hear Louis out after ignoring him for so long. He knows Louis’ going to ask to meet Ainsley, that’s a given. Harry’s still up in arms about that. Harry’s daughter isn’t too fond of strangers. Ainsley’s been used to such a routine with daycare and her sitter, Kelly, that throwing different people into her life so suddenly could be detrimental to her development. All the parenting books Harry’s read about child development states that putting a child in a comfortable routine and keeping said routine plays a vital role in their upbringing. If a child’s routine is hindered or interrupted, it’s nearly the equivalent of a child experiencing a traumatic event. Harry simply couldn’t do that to his princess. He’d never forgive himself.

Harry’s startled out of his thoughts when Louis sets the piping mug of coffee down in front of Harry. “Sorry, mate, didn’t mean to startle you,” Louis apologizes. “You okay? You look proper out of it.”

“Just have a lot on my mind,” Harry answers truthfully as he scoops up the mug and casually sips at the hot beverage. He hums in a content, a little smile playing at his lips. “Thank you for the coffee.”

“Anytime.” Louis takes his place in the velvet seat across from Harry and idly taps his fingers against his own mug, his wedding band clanking against the ceramic. “Sooo.”

“ _Sooo_ what?” Harry laughs. “ _You_ invited _me_ out for coffee, so you tell me.”

There’s a moment of tense silence before Louis finally speaks. “Why won’t you let me meet Ainsley?”

_Of course_ Louis would ask that. If anything, that’s what this whole coffee meeting is about. “Because I have no intentions of getting back with you,” Harry says blatantly.

“That’s a bit harsh, don’t ya think?”

“Says the person who sold out four years ago,” Harry spits.

Louis’ eyes widen at Harry’s venomous tone. “We were young!”

“Yes. We were, but that didn’t give you the right to up and marry the first bird your family fancied.”

“That’s not fair…” Louis argues.

Harry stares at Louis, face menacing. “Oh, but it is, Louis. It’s the truth. Did you forget we were in love? We promised each other forever and always, remember? Us against the world, hell or high water, through thick and thin. Or were those lines all bullshit from the beginning?”

Louis fish-mouths for a response and Harry instantly knows he’s called Louis on his shit. Harry can read Louis like a book and sometimes that is proven more bad than good.

“I was scared, Harry. I told you that. I-I panicked. Elle was the solution!”

Harry scoffs. This shorter male can’t be serious. How could Louis easily break off a relationship in favor of marrying some bird? Harry _knows_ Louis likes cock and will only _ever_ like cock. “You’re unbelievable!”

“I didn’t come here to argue about our past, Harry,” Louis relents. “I was hoping we can start fresh. Baby steps, yeah?”

“Baby steps,” Harry mocks. “And what do you expect to get out of all this?”

“Friendship? Shared custody of Ainsley?” Louis suggests but instantly regrets his response when Harry’s eyes flash with malice.

“Excuse me?” Harry spits, slamming his mug down on the table between them. The doile mutes the sound and Harry’s momentarily grateful because he doesn’t want to cause a scene anymore than he already is. “ _Shared custody?_ You truly believe that for _one moment_ I’d _willingly_ give half of my parental rights away?” Harry exclaims. His hands tremble as he continues his mini rampage. “Were you there during my entire pregnancy? No! Or how about when I lost my footing and fell down a flight of stairs when I was twenty-four weeks along? And don’t you even try and lie and say you didn’t know about that because I _know_ for a bloody fact that my mum called you then. Stupid me still believed that you’d realize the mistake you made and want to be in me and Ainsley’s lives.”

“Harry--

\--No,” Harry cuts Louis off. “If my memory serves me correctly, my mum didn’t even get the chance to tell you I was in the hospital let alone expecting _your_ baby because--what did you tell her again?--oh, yes, that I was ‘old history’ and that you were married to Elle now.”

By the end of his rant, Harry’s eyes were wet with angry tears, leaving Louis flabbergasted and at a loss for words. He deserves everything Harry told him if he’s honest. Especially after suggesting he get shared custody of Ainsley. 

“I said a lot of things I didn’t mean back then, Harry, and I’m so sorry for everything. I truly mean that. I didn’t mean to put you through all of that hell. This is me owning up to my mistakes and hoping to make things right,” Louis explains.

“You should have made things right four years ago.”

Louis nods because Harry does have a point. He leans forward in his seat, reaching out to grip Harry’s hands in his own. “I should have, you’re absolutely right. I made a terrible mistake marrying Elle four years ago. It should have been you.”

And okay. Harry doesn’t expect that response from Louis. And maybe Harry’s been reacting a bit selfishly about this entire ordeal. He has no idea what’s been going on in Louis’ life. For all Harry knows, Louis could be in living hell. Maybe he and Elle are going through a rough patch. Maybe Elle’s cheating on him. Maybe she’s in the same boat as Louis and only married him to prove to her family that she was straight. The last option seems a bit far fetched but a man can only hope.

“Should have been me?” Harry questions. “Did something happen between you and Elle?”

Louis purses his lips and his eyes soften a bit. For the first time since they’ve been sitting here, Harry can see the pain in Louis’ eyes and how miserable he looks. Now, Harry wonders if Louis’ _ever_ been happy with Elle.

“Ever since you and I ran into each other at the grocery store that day, everything changed between Elle and I,” Louis explains. “That night she bombarded me about my past. She knew I had a male lover in the past named ‘H’ but that’s all I would tell her and I guess when she saw you at the grocery store and I introduced you to her, everything clicked.”

So she put two and two together, “ Harry concedes.

“She did.”

“And then what?” Harry asks because he’s honestly curious. Is Louis still married to her? Are they getting a divorce? Do they still live in the same house?

Louis pauses before he answers. “She asked me if I still loved you.”

Harry gasps. He’s afraid to know the answer to his next question. “A-And what did you tell her?”

“That I’ve never stopped loving you.”

“Oh, God,” Harry whispers, letting out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Please tell me you’re lying.”

Louis furrows his brows and sits up straight, letting his hands slip from Harry’s. “Why would I lie about something like that?”

“To make it easier to move on…”

“I don’t want to move on and I know you don’t want to either.”

Just like Harry can read Louis like a book, Louis can do the same with him. He _didn’t_ want to move on. Deep down he wants to make things right with Louis again--to start fresh. But, at the same time, he doesn’t want to jostle or ruin Ainsley’s childhood by throwing another person into her life that Harry wasn’t certain will stay.

“I _don’t_ want to move on,” Harry admits.

That’s all Louis needs to hear because he rounds the small table in an instant and crouches down in front of Harry, grabbing his hands again. He peers up at the taller lad with eager blue eyes. 

“Don’t move on, Haz. Give me another chance,” Louis pleads. “Let me love you again.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things seem to flow smoothly between Harry and Louis for the next month. Harry’s fallen into this routine of spending every other weekend with Louis whether it be staying in and watching movies they find on television or going out for dinners and activities that Louis deems date-worthy. Harry’s mini fairytale comes to a halt one Tuesday evening at the market when he stops in to get some last minute ingredients for dinner before he has to pick up Ainsley from daycare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Peoples! 
> 
> I have returned with a new chapter! I've got chapter 4 in the works and I'm not sure how many more I'll associate with this story. As soon as Reminiscent is finished, those who read my Supernatural fics, I'll have chapter 2 of Drunk Me for you! It's a slow-going process but I assure you, I will continue Psychotic Love. That particular story takes A LOT of research and planning! Anyway, enough of my rambling, GO READ! :D
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are always welcomed :)

Surely, Harry’s lost his mind as he stares down at his naked body, dried come from the night before streaked and crusty along his torso as he looks over to Louis’ equally naked body, the older lad snoring softly with the sheets bunched up around his legs.

Everything happened so fast. One moment he and Louis were at the movies, sharing a bucket of popcorn waiting for the trailers to play, and the next he was being pushed up against Louis’ SUV with his hand down Harry’s pants and filthy words being whispered into his ear. Now, here Harry lies in _Louis’_ bed with _Louis’_ come leaking out of him. Thank God Harry’s mum has Ainsley for the weekend or he’d feel like a horrible parent if he had to make last minute arrangements for someone to watch his daughter in favor of getting fucked.

Granted, it’s only been a couple of months since their coffee date and Louis wanting a second chance, but Harry should have not been this eager to feel Louis inside him again. But on the other hand, Louis’ his first love and he gave him a child after all. Regardless, Harry’s at a standstill at this point in his life. He’s not sure if he’s ready to introduce Louis into Ainsley’s life quite yet. He’s not even sure if he’s ready to be in a relationship and experience what he’s so desperately missed in the last 5 years being a single father. The illogical part of Harry feels like a failure as a daddy sneaking around his princess’ back every other weekend to go on mini-dates with Louis. The logical part of Harry’s brain has him realizing that Ainsley is only five and half the time she’s so preoccupied with her toys and spending time with her Nana that it hardly matters that her daddy has been gone more times than not. Nevertheless, Harry’s devoted his entire life to her and now that Louis’ back in life--for how long, he’s not certain--he believes the devotion will falter. 

After a late night conversation with his mum and some motherly advice, he’s finally allowed Louis to take him on a proper dates; this one having led to filthy words and messy sheets. Oh, God, what is he doing?

Louis stirs in his sleep before sleepy blue eyes open to meet alert green ones. “Morning, sunshine,” Louis mumbles with a tired smile, reaching an arm out to pull the taller male against his body.

Harry automatically curls into Louis’ body, entangling their legs beneath the wrinkled sheets. “Hi.” Louis’ hands roam the expanse of Harry’s back, eventually finding purchase on his pert bum and gives it a little squeeze. Harry gasps and bucks his hips against Louis’ groin pulling a breathy moan from the shorter lad. “M’sore, Lou.”

“I’d say,” Louis laughs. “You properly wore me out last night, love. Didn’t think I’d get you to come three times.”

Harry’s cheeks flush and he swats at Louis’ chest. “Shu’up. I’ve been celibate for five years, sue me.”

Louis smirks and squeezes Harry’s bum again and sucks a mark along his clavicle. “We could go again if you want.” As appealing as that sounds, Harry has to decline, especially when he starts to feel Louis’ fingers nudge against his sensitive hole. 

“Lou, wait…” Harry protests, grabbing Louis’ wrist and pulling his hand away from his bum. He sits up and faces Louis before crossing his legs and resting his hands in his lap. “We need to talk about last night.”

Louis’ playful antics stop and his smile falters as he sits up, too, resting his back against the headboard. “You’re regretting it…”

“No!” Harry quickly says, hands shooting out to grab Louis’. “Far from it. Last night was amazing. I really enjoyed myself. It felt good, _you_ felt good,” he reassures. “It’s just...we’ve only been dating for two months.”

“But we’ve known each other forever, Haz,” Louis counters. “I thought last night was rekindling what was lost.”

“Be that as it may, we can’t just fall into old territory again. It’ll turn into a purely physical and carnal relationship. We have to take baby steps, remember? Dinner and a movie is fine, but the sex… we have to try and refrain.”  
Louis chews on his bottom lip and Harry wants to kiss the worries away but withholds. He knows the kiss will lead to more and they need to talk while Harry’s mind is still clear. It’s a long time overdue.

“Okay,” Louis relents. “Baby steps. So, now what?”

Harry purses his lips and squeezes Louis’ hands. “I know you told me you didn’t want to talk about it and I’ve taken your feelings into consideration but I need answers, Lou.”

Louis closes his eyes and lets out a deep breath. “Okay. Fire away.”

And really, Harry wasn’t expecting Louis to just simply allow Harry to delve into his past and relationship with Elle. He was half expecting to keep his guard up, to beat around the bush about certain topics and questions. Harry remembers Louis making him the promise back in the coffee shop two months ago that there’d be no more secrets between them if they wanted their relationship to work.

“Are you still married to Elle?” Harry interrogates.

“Yes,” Louis answers simply. “But we’re in the process of getting a divorce.”

Harry’s eyes widen. “When did this get decided?”

Harry briefly remembers Louis mentioning divorcing Elle during their coffee date but he assumed Louis had only said that in the heat of the moment.

“A few weeks after I saw you at the market.” Or maybe Louis _is_ serious about his undying love for him if the shorter lad had planned to divorce Elle well before the coffee date and well before he knew whether or not Harry would take Louis back.

“Was it her decision or yours?” Harry asks.

“It was mutual.”

Harry quirks a brow. “Really?”

Louis deflates. “No. She came home one evening completely plastered, droning on and on about how I betrayed her but that it was obvious I wasn’t completely over you and yadda yadda,” he explains, using hand gestures for emphasis.

Harry nods, urging Louis to continue. “And then what?”

“You really want specifics?”

“Honesty, remember?” Harry reminds.

“Honesty. Right,” Louis agrees. It isn’t as if Harry’s a stranger or that Louis’ confused about his sexual orientation. He came to terms with that a long time ago which resulted in some unforeseen circumstances and has led him to this current predicament. “Each time Elle and I would have sex, it always seemed like a chore. It’d take me _ages_ to get it up and half the time, the only way she’d get me off was if she blew me. She never knew I was always envisioning you.”

Harry’s eyes widen and he splutters for a response. “Y-You fantasized about me?”

“All the time,” Louis answers sheepishly, cheeks pinking. “Don’t sound so surprised.”

“I’m n-not,” Harry stammers. “It’s just that _you_ broke up with _me_ so I thought…”

Louis leans forward and cups Harry’s face, thumbing his cheeks. Harry nearly goes cross-eyed staring intently at Louis. “You were my first true love--still _are_ my true love. It killed me as much as it killed you when I broke up with you,” Louis whispers. If Louis spoke any louder, Harry swore he would hear the devastation in his voice. “God, I was such a stupid and immature teenager who let the fear of rejection and ridicule from my family affect the love we had for each other. For fuck’s sake, I left you single and _pregnant_ a-and had I known we had created more than a lasting memory that night I would have never left.”

Harry sighs and brings his hands up to caress Louis’ wrists before pulling Louis’ hands from his face and holding them in his lap. “You can’t say you would have stayed, Louis, because you were too involved with your family and their opinions about you--about _us._ ”

Louis doesn’t reply and as devastating as it is to Harry to know he’s right, he shouldn’t be surprised. They were young, dumb, and in love. They weren’t careful and as a result, Harry had Ainsley. Their entire conversation has gone too dark and solemn and Harry doesn’t like it. He smiles softly up at Louis and pecks his lips.

“But that’s the past, Lou, this is now,” Harry assures, smiling when Louis’ mouth twists into a grin of its own. “Things are going to be different...right?”

“Of course,” Louis quickly responds. “I don’t want to make the same mistake twice.”

And thank God. Despite all forces--most of them being Harry’s own demons--keeping them apart, he misses Louis. He misses their midnight conversations and Louis’ giddy laughter and obnoxious behavior when they’re sleep deprived. Harry knows things are different now and that they cannot go back to being reckless teenagers with sleepless nights of lovemaking or wreaking havoc at the neighborhood park. Having a child will sober someone up in a heartbeat. What Harry _does_ know is that he’s ready to start fresh--to love again. He’s so sick of being alone. Five years of raising a child on your own can really take a toll on one’s sanity. That, and watching Paw Patrol and Peppa Pig five days out of seven with a young child who’s memorized the theme songs. 

Harry moves to straddle Louis’ hips and rests his arms on Louis’ shoulders. He presses his lips to Louis’ and hums when Louis eagerly reciprocates. He enjoys their embrace for a moment, feeling his cock stir just the slightest when Louis nips at his bottom lip and pulls away. “Despite what you’ve put me through almost six years ago, I never stopped loving you and I never will.”

Harry sees Louis’ face light up as he rests his hands on Harry’s hips and thumbs at the laurel tattoos inked against his hip bones. “I know we’re taking it slow--this relationship and all--but I love you, Haz, and I hope that we can be a legitimate couple.”

Harry explores Louis’ features, looking for any falsities of Louis’ affirmation. This man was probably as torn as Harry was the night he walked out of his life. Here they are, in the same position they had found themselves in five years ago when their lives had changed forever. Only this time, tears weren’t being exchanged and Louis wasn’t kissing him goodbye--holding onto what they thought was forever. Call it fate, but they were always meant for each other.

“I want that, too, Lou,” Harry agrees, caressing Louis’ cheek and pecking his lips once more before climbing off his lap and searching the room for his scattered clothes. “But we can’t be official until your divorce is final.”

Louis follows Harry’s movements as the taller lad slips on his briefs and shakes out his skinnies. “That’s fair. Can we still fool around?”

Harry pauses after slipping on his skinnies and buttoning them up. He shakes his head before bending down to retrieve his t-shirt. “Fooling around, maybe, but no more sex.”

Louis blanches. “The divorce could take months!”

Harry slips on his shirt and crosses his arms over his chest. “I don’t care, Louis. I want to be your boyfriend not your mistress.”

“You wouldn’t be my mistress!” Louis argues from his spot in the bed. “You’re only a mistress if your spouse doesn’t know about the affair. Elle and I are separated.”

Harry laughs at Louis’ inaccurate definition and explanation and looks around for his shoes. “A mistress is someone who has sex with a _married_ man, Lou. You and Elle may be separated but legally, you’ll still be married.”

Louis sighs clearly having lost this argument. “She moved out, Haz. That’s why you don’t see her stuff anywhere.”

“Regardless, Lou. I’m adamant in my decision,” Harry declares. “No more sex until the divorce is final and we’re officially dating. Last night was amazing, don’t get me wrong, but I acted on my impulses and the five years of celibacy.” 

Harry finally finds his shoes in the doorway of Louis’ bedroom and quickly stuffs his feet in them before returning to Louis and sitting on the edge of the bed.

“I can’t say your request isn’t fair,” Louis reluctantly agrees. “I’d be an arse if I fought you on this. I’ll prove to you that I’ve changed and that I want to be with you. I’ll remain abstinent with you until the divorce is final if that’s what you truly want. I’ll even go to the courthouse first thing Monday morning and start the filing process. I don’t want to lose you again.”

***

Things seem to flow smoothly between Harry and Louis for the next month. Harry’s fallen into this routine of spending every other weekend with Louis whether it be staying in and watching movies they find on television or going out for dinners and activities that Louis deems date-worthy. Most of the time, Harry opts for nights in with Louis since he nearly drains himself of energy from working double shifts during the week to support his daughter. When Louis offered to pay for Ainsley’s daycare, Harry had broken down into tears because spending $300 every two weeks for her daycare whether it be at the facility or with a sitter put a strain on his finances. Of course, it took some haggling and minor arguing mainly on Harry’s part before he finally allowed Louis to contribute. Louis’ claim was that Ainsley was his daughter, too, even if he hadn’t been given the opportunity to meet her yet and that he was more than happy to contribute.

Harry’s mini fairytale comes to a halt one Tuesday evening at the market when he stops in to get some last minute ingredients for dinner before he has to pick up Ainsley from daycare. He’s in the produce section surveying different potatoes when he’s suddenly approached by none other than Elle Tomlinson. He blinks in surprise and casually takes a step back to give them space.

“Hi, Elle,” Harry greets politely with a genuine smile. “Fancy seeing you here.” Judging on the sour look on her face and the way she’s fighting a snarl, Elle was in no mood for pleasantries. 

“Is it true?” she spits. “Is Louis your daughter’s father?”

Surely, this is not the time nor place for family drama, let alone this discussion. Fortunately, the market was somewhat empty and the shoppers didn’t seem to pay any mind to the little confrontation slowly unfolding in the produce department.

“Erm, you know the answer, Elle,” Harry responds quietly. He’s a bit baffled if he’s honest. Had she followed him into the store or was she already shopping? Why didn’t she just get his number from Louis and set up a time and place to have this conversation? This entire scene seems a bit hostile. “You know Louis is Ainsley’s father. Louis told you the day you questioned him about it, yeah?” Did Louis lie? Harry suddenly feels sick.

Elle eyes Harry as she crosses her arms over his fake chest. This woman was more plastic than human if her fake breasts, Botoxed face, and manicured nails are anything to go by. It makes Harry wonder why Louis chose _her_ of all people to be his wife. This woman was far from humble. The way she exudes herself screams entitlement. 

“He may have mentioned something.”

“Then why ask me if you already knew?” Harry bites back, checking the time on his phone. The facility closes in an hour and if he doesn’t leave shortly, he’ll get charged a late fee. “I don’t know why this is such a shock to you, Elle. Frankly, I’m not sure what game you’re playing at, but I need to go pick up my daughter. So, if you’ll excuse me--

\--he’s divorcing me,” Elle blurts out, tone so icy it sends chills through Harry. “But I’m sure you already knew that.”

Harry visibly swallows and chews on his bottom lip. What’s he supposed to say exactly? He’s not going to apologize for a decision that was strictly Louis’. It’s not as if Elle _didn’t_ know Louis bats for the same team. Based on what Louis’ said in the past, they’ve had marital problems long before they ran into Harry at the market. 

“Louis told me.”

“We were fine until you entered his life again,” Elle accuses and Harry bites back the urge to scoff. “We were happy and you ruined everything.”

Harry blinks. “Excuse me?”

“We were going to start a family. Our parents were over the moon when we made the announcement that we were trying for a baby.”

Harry gasps and stares at the woman with wide eyes. No, that’s a lie. Louis would never have a child with the likes of a woman like Elle. Or would he? The nausea returns tenfold and Harry’s struggling to prevent himself from upchucking his lunch. “That’s a lie.”

Elle grins maliciously, as if Harry’s torment was what she was waiting for. “Not a lie, Harry. Louis had brought up the idea actually. _Of course_ he wouldn’t disclose that piece of information to you.”

Harry swallows the bile in his mouth and suddenly feels lightheaded. Had this last month been a lie? Did Louis play him? No. Harry knows Louis. They were best friends before they were lovers. Louis wouldn’t hurt Harry this way. Elle is an attention whore and she was spewing this information so Harry could hurt the way she was hurting. She was doing and saying any and everything to get a rise out of Harry, he was certain.

“Honestly, Elle, I am just beside myself at why Louis chose _you_ of all people to be his beard,” Harry remarks, earning a surprised squawk from the prissy woman. He is sick of this conversation and sick to his stomach and he really needs to go pick up his daughter. “You’re a dramatic and manipulative bitch who uses other people’s flaws to mask your own issues. You and I both know Louis’ gay and has _always_ been gay. He only married you to appease his family.”

Elle’s eyes widen as she fishmouths for a retort. Check and mate. Harry wins. Elle’s eyes suddenly narrow and she crowds up into Harry’s personal space, pressing a manicured nail against his chest. “Louis’ not going to leave me for you. He belongs with me. Mark my words, Harry. You’re nothing but a warm mouth to him.”

“Fuck you!” Harry snaps. “You don’t and never will love Louis the way I love him. If you think that you’re going to return to the picturesque, apple pie life you once had with him, then you’re thoroughly mistaken. He’s always loved _me,_ he’s never loved you.”

Harry quickly sets the basket of groceries down and hurries out of the market. Ainsley will have to settle for fast food tonight--not that his daughter will mind. His hands are shaking and he’s fighting off angry tears and he nearly rips his car door open and falls into his seat. His hand frantically swipes at his phone, pulling up Louis’ contact and taps at his number. The phone rings three times before Louis’ voice floods the speaker.

“We need to talk.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You know, when she was first born, she looked exactly like you despite her nose and mouth. I almost lost it right then. I wasn’t sure how to raise a little girl that looked exactly like the man that left me to raise her alone.”
> 
> Louis’ stomach churns with guilt. He wants travel back in time to change things; to never have walked out on Harry that night. Unfortunately life doesn’t work that way and all that Louis can do now is be there for Harry and Ainsley. “That was the past, Haz. I’m not going anywhere now. I want to watch her grow up, if you’ll let me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Peoples!
> 
> I told you I had chapter 4 in the works and low and behold, here it is! :D 
> 
> This story is coming to an end and I would have thought more people would have read it. Hopefully with these next 2 chapters, people will read more and love it. Thank you to those who _have_ been reading it, you are my heroes! :P
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are welcomed!

Harry doesn’t know what to feel, let alone react to Elle’s bombardment at the grocery store. The moment he left the store he had called Louis, ready to curse him out for letting Elle behave the way she did. Then again, it’s not like she is Louis’ property. She’s a real piece of work maybe borderline a bitch and Harry’s definitely certain of that. She had no right to say the things she did, let alone demand Harry that leave Louis alone with the claim that she and Louis were planning to have a baby and that they’d be happily in love again. Within 2 hours, Harry had Ainsley fed, bathed, and tucked in bed before he was counting down the minutes for Louis to come over so they could have a proper chat.

Harry’s pacing his flat’s living room when there’s a knock on the door that nearly startles him. He shuffles to the door and answers it, Louis standing in the doorway looking alarmed and unsure of himself.

“Hey, Lou--

Louis immediately dives in for a kiss, hands cupping Harry’s face as his tongue desperately tries to gain access into his boyfriend’s mouth. The startled gasp from Harry allows the intrusion and Harry welcomes it with equal vigor. Perhaps this is reassurance on both parties and Harry’s grateful for it. It’s not that Harry believed Elle, it was the notion that she was truly convinced that Louis wouldn’t leave her. Despite her insane thoughts and demented reality, Harry needs to hear the words from Louis himself; needs to know that Louis wants to be with Harry and not her.

“Well, hello to you, too,” Harry pants with a breathless laugh. 

“Everything she said was bullshit,” Louis blurts out. “Everything.”

“She told you what she said?”

“Some of it, I think, but I’m sure you’ll fill in the blanks, yeah?”

Harry nods and pulls Louis into the flat. Louis settles on Harry’s worn out couch and pats the empty space next to him. Harry obliges and sits cross-legged next to Louis. 

“Elle’s just upset that her perfect world is falling apart.”

“I sort of figured,” Harry responds with a wry laugh. “She’s quite the attention whore, if I may say.”

“You can,” Louis laughs. “She is one, though. She was envied by all her friends for marrying a knockout like yours truly and now that we’re divorcing she’s gone mental.”

Harry laughs at Louis’ narcissistic remark. “A total knockout huh? I mean, I can agree with her there. You _are_ a total knockout.”

Louis rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

“It’s true,” Harry admits. “It’s what first caught my eye; your beauty. I mean, you’re still beautiful now, of course, but when I first met you in the toilets back in upper school, I was just blown away, pun _intended._ ”

Louis’ cheeks pink and he tries to avoid his boyfriend’s gaze. “Haz, stop, you’re making me blush.”

Harry giggles and pecks Louis’ lips for good measure. “Is it true what she said, though, about you and her trying for a baby?”

Louis’ eyes widen and he splutters for a response. “Is that what she said?”

Harry purses his lips and nods. “Uh huh, and she said it was _your_ idea to start a family.”

“She’s daft, that bird,” Louis snorts in disbelief. “There’s no way in hell I’d father one of her children. She’d use that child as a bloody icon.”

“That’s an extreme accusation,” Harry counters. Harry’s in no way defending Elle but he could never imagine a parent only wanting a child for a status quo. He could never do that with Ainsley. He’s too in love with that little girl.

“It’s the truth. Elle’s selfish; only cares for herself and is more concerned with what people think of her. She used to never be this way. I mean, when we first got married, I thought I was in love with her, you know? She was beautiful and sweet and down to earth. She married into my money and suddenly it was Prada this and Gucci that with expensive daily brunches and tea meetings with equally prissy women she called her friends.”

The way Louis explains his soon-to-be ex wife’s lifestyle, the more miserable he appears. Harry doesn’t like seeing his boyfriend that way and reaches a hand out to caress Louis’ arm. 

“I’m glad you don’t have to be in that toxic relationship anymore, Lou.”

 

“I was never happy in that relationship, Hazza. I used to think I was in the beginning but the more the days drug on, I realized I only wanted you.”

“You could have had me the entire time, Lou, but…”

“...I was a coward, I know,” Louis finishes, dropping his head and looking properly dejected.

“Hey,” Harry begins, lifting Louis’ chin with his thumb and forefinger. “We were only kids. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, right?”

Louis gazes into Harry’s emerald eyes and nods with a timid smile. “Right.”

“Call it fate or some other mysterious force that brought us back together, but we’re meant for each other. We always were.”

“I was so scared when you called me, Haz. You sounded so angry and upset on the phone and when you told me that Elle confronted you at the market, my heart stopped. I swore you asked me to come over to end things between us.”

Harry’s eyes widen a fraction and he shakes his head. “No, Louis, never. I won’t--I refuse to let you walk out of my life a third time.”

All of Louis’ nerves seem to dissipate from Harry’s words as he leans forward and kisses Harry with renowned fervor, hands tangling in the taller lad’s hair and tugging lightly. Harry gasps into Louis’ mouth as he feels his cock stir.

“Jesus, Lou,” Harry pants breathlessly and adjusts himself in his skinnies. “We can’t. What if Ainsley wakes up?”

Louis pecks Harry’s lips before he sits back to give Harry a chance to breathe. “I know. I just wanted a kiss.”

“You practically mauled my face,” Harry accuses. Louis laughs at that, a little too loud and Harry shoots Louis a look when he hears a childish whine from Ainsley’s room. “So help me, God, if you woke her up, Lou.” Louis smiles sheepishly and covers his mouth in attempt to contain his laughter. Harry rolls his eyes before he pats Louis’ thigh and stands up. “I’m gonna go check on her.”

Louis watches Harry disappear to the bedroom with a painted pink crown on the door. He doesn’t expect Harry to return with a toddler clinging tightly to him and his heart speeds up upon realization that Harry’s allowing Louis to finally meet his daughter.

“I think someone owes this princess an apology for waking her up,” Harry remarks with a smile.

Louis smiles at the half awake little girl who’s stares sleepy-eyed back at him, clutching a stuffed monkey tight to her little frame. Louis doesn’t know if he should introduce himself as her second daddy or as Harry’s friend. Granted she’s only four and probably doesn’t grasp the concept of her parents’ pasts, Louis decides on the latter.

“Hi, Ainsley, I’m Louis. You look like a princess in your unicorn jammies. Are unicorns your favorite animal?”

Ainsley doesn’t respond. Instead she turns her head away from Louis and buries it in her daddy’s chest. Harry chuckles and rubs his daughter’s back in attempt to soothe her. 

“It’s okay, lovely, Louis is a nice man. He’s daddy’s best friend,” he remarks, winking at Louis whose chest flutters with giddiness and admiration.

Ainsley remains unfazed by the new knowledge and keeps her face smothered against Harry’s chest and mumbles something only Harry seems to hear and understand. “Alright, sweetheart, that’s okay. Let’s get you back to bed. I’ll be right back, Lou.”

Harry mouths an apology but Louis waves it off. He remembers when his sisters were Ainsley’s age and how shy they were with new people. He waits patiently on the couch for his boyfriend and perks up when he hears the slightly click of Ainsley’s door close and Harry smiling abashedly at Louis.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t think it’d take half an hour for her to fall back asleep.”

“It’s okay. I’m sure she wanted to spend time with her daddy.”

“It’s been me and her for four years so she’s extremely attached to me,” Harry responds.

Louis nods. “I get it.”

Harry smiles and leans in for a chaste kiss. “I love you, you know.”

Louis hums against Harry’s lips and nods. “And I love you. Thank you for finally letting me meet her. Even if the meet and greet wasn’t mutual. Ainsley’s gorgeous by the way.”

Harry beams proudly at Louis’ last statement. “Well, I’ve been debating on the right time to introduce you to each other but after all the hard work you’ve been doing to prove to me how much you love me and want to be with me I figured now was a good time. Especially after all that transpired earlier today.”

“It means a lot to me that I finally got to meet her. I know we’re still in the beginning stage and that to her I’m your best friend but I hope one day she can call me daddy, too.”

“One day, Lou, I promise. One step at time.”

“I’m prepared to take baby steps.”

“You know, when she was first born, she looked exactly like you despite her nose and mouth. I almost lost it right then. I wasn’t sure how to raise a little girl that looked exactly like the man that left me to raise her alone.”

Louis’ stomach churns with guilt. He wants travel back in time to change things; to never have walked out on Harry that night. Unfortunately life doesn’t work that way and all that Louis can do now is be there for Harry and Ainsley. “That was the past, Haz. I’m not going anywhere now. I want to watch her grow up, if you’ll let me.”

“I’ll let you,” Harry agrees. “We made a pretty cute girl didn’t we?” 

Louis tips onto his back and brings Harry with him. Harry tries to brace himself so he doesn’t collapse on Louis but he’s all limbs and clumsy and it makes Louis laugh. He’s so in love with this boy that he would probably shoot himself if he walks out of Harry’s life again.

“I’d say. I wouldn’t be surprised if we made another from our spontaneous romp a month ago,” Louis jokes with a giggle.

Harry’s smile drops instantly. Though he knows Louis’ only kidding, the taller male starts to panic inwardly. They were caught up in the heat of the moment and forgot a condom. The majority of fault goes to Harry for being so eager to have Louis inside him that he forgot to mention he wasn’t on birth control. 

“Fuck.”

Louis furrows his brows and sits up to get a better look at his boyfriend. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m not on birth control and you didn’t use a condom…”

Realization dawns on Louis almost immediately. “Oh shit.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis meets Harry by the car by the time he pulls into the driveway and cuts the engine. Louis practically throws the door open and smiles giddily. He looks like he’s about to explode and Harry can’t help but laugh. “Weeeell?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Peoples!! :D
> 
> This is the last chapter of Reminiscent! There will be an epilogue so do not fret, my dears!
> 
> Thanks again to all who have read, commented, and kudos'd my work!! <3

Louis’ little joke 2 weeks ago has panicked Harry. There’s no way he can be pregnant again. He would have gone to the doctor’s sooner but if his calculations are correct, the tests could come up as false positives if he didn’t wait the 2 weeks. Harry cannot afford another child. He’s struggling with raising Ainsley as it is.

Louis had offered to go with Harry to his doctor’s visit but Harry politely declined. This was something he needs to do on his own. Despite the comfort that Louis will provide sitting next to Harry, Louis’ hand in his own while they await the anxious news, Harry thinks, he’s more afraid of Louis’ reaction if the blood test _do_ end up positive.

If Harry takes a step back and assesses the situation, it is honestly not the end of the world. He’s not going to be a single parent with this child. He’s no longer a single parent with Ainsley now that Louis’ paying for her daycare and half of the groceries. Harry had to draw the line at Louis covering his rent, too. He still wanted to be able to support his daughter one way or another and covering his rent would make him feel like he’s incapable. Another part of the situation that keeps Harry’s mind from going completely berserk is the fact that this is Louis’ baby and not some random man’s. He’s the father to both his children and even though this child--if there is one--is definitely unsuspected and definitely unplanned, Harry’s eighty-five percent confident Louis isn’t going anywhere. At the end of the day, Harry sees a bright future.

Harry bounces his leg nervously as he waits anxiously for the nurse to call him back with the results. Louis’ been texting him the entire time in hopes to keep Harry’s mind off the sole purpose of being in the doctor’s office but their conversations keep reverting back to ‘what if’ scenarios with the second baby.

_L: Any news?_

_H: Still waiting_

_L: It’s like torture huh?_

_H: Pretty much_

_L: Whatever happens, I’m not going anywhere_

_H: You say that now..._

_L: I’m serious. I meant what I said. I refuse to let you go a 3rd time Haz  
_

_H: Well that makes me feel better_

_L: Stop being sarcastic_

_H: I’m not! I’m serious Lou. If I didn’t have you right now I’d properly lose my mind._

It’s true. If Louis wasn’t texting him, he’d probably work himself into a proper fit, chicken out, and hide away forever.

_L: If there is a second baby, I want you to move in with me._

Harry gasps. Move in with him? Oh, God, that’s a huge step in their relationship. How would Ainsley adapt? She’s been in that apartment since birth. She’s learned to crawl, walk, and talk in that little home. What would she think? Would she even understand? Harry feels dizzy thinking about it all. 

_H: What? Lou, that’s a BIG step_

_L: It is but our relationship is different. It’s not like we haven’t known each other forever you know. I’m not asking you to move in tomorrow or even in a month, just eventually. Will you think about it?_

_H: Would you have asked me to move in with you if we weren’t in this current predicament?_

_L: Of course. You’re my boyfriend and hopefully one day you’ll be my husband. I wanna wake up next to you for the rest of my life._

Harry can’t stop the smile splitting his face at Louis’ words. He’ll definitely be Louis’ husband one day. It’s all he dreams about.

_H: :Alright. (: I’ll think about it._

_L: Good. You know I love you right?_

_H: I know. I love you too. I’ve never stopped_

_L: Me neither Haz. I love you AND Ainsley AND this new baby._

_H: We don’t know if there’s actually going to be one_

_L: Do YOU think there’s going to be one?_

Harry bites his lip. His chest as been incredibly sore and his hormones have definitely been unpredictable. Just the other day he broke down into heart-wrenching sobs because he dropped his sandwich on the floor.

_H: I think so_

_L: Then we’ll take one day at a time yes?_

_H: Baby steps_

_L: Yes, baby steps_

_H: The anticipation is killing me_

_L: How much longer do you suppose?_

_H: No idea_

_L: You’ll survive lol :P_

_H: Imagine being in my shoes!_

_L: I’ve been in other places ;)_

_H: Oi! Naughty!_

_L: Oh you love it!_

_H: Maybe..._

_L: Such a dork. But you’re my dork_

_H: Damn right. They’re calling me back now. Gotta go_

Harry follows the bubbly nurse down the hall to a small exam room where there’s posters, diagrams, and brochures regarding different stages of pregnancies and choices a mother can make if she so desires to give up the child. It’s nothing new to Harry but it does bring back memories. 

He remembers his mom bringing him here when he first suspected he might be pregnant. He felt so bloody awkward sitting next to the woman who birthed him while there were explicit diagrams of childbirth on full display. Needless to say, the pictures on how childbirth worked in one of the brochures he had found himself reading were enough to scare him shitless.

Now, Harry simply ignores it all as he sits on the exam table and swings his legs idly. He watches the nurse pull up the stool and sit across from Harry as she browses through his file. 

“How are we today, Harry?” She asks with a genuine smile.

“Nervous. This wasn’t planned,” Harry deadpans.

“Ah, I see. You’re not the only one, I assure you.”

“I know. I already have a four year at home and she’s a handful.”

The nurse giggles. “I definitely know what you mean, I have twin boys at home and they’re only one.”

“God, bless you,” Harry gasps. 

Harry’s well aware that there’s a possibility of having multiples. Harry prayed nearly every night that he’d only have one baby instead of two before he found out Ainsley was going to be one little girl. Now, Harry is still going to pray for the same thing. It’s one thing to raise a four year old and a newborn but a four year old and _twins_? Oh good Lord, he’s not ready for that.

The nurse continues to read over Harry’s results before she finds what she’s looking for and glances up at the anxious man. “You’re definitely pregnant. The amount of HCG in your blood puts you at around seven or eight weeks.”

Harry doesn’t know how to react. His stomach does a somersault and his mouth goes dry. He’s pregnant. Again. With Louis’ child. Again. Harry purses his lips and nods, wipes his sweaty hands on his pant legs before he stands.

“Thank you for the news. I know the routine; prenatals, lots of folic acid, make an appointment up front for a month from now and no, I’m keeping the baby so adoption and abortion are out of the question.”

The nurse stifles a smirk and hands Harry a blank appointment card. “Took the words right out of my mouth, dear.”

Harry laughs. “Sorry. This is nothing new to me.”

“Of course. You have a great day, Harry, and congratulations. We’ll see you next month for your check-up. The doctor will be able to give you a due date by then as well.”

“Thanks again,” Harry says waving goodbye to the nurse before heading up front to make an appointment. He knows Louis will want to attend the next one. If he does the 3D sonogram, they’ll be able to find out the gender.

Harry’s all shaky as he gets into his beat up Jetta. Holy fuck, he’s having another baby. With Louis nonetheless. He’s definitely not ready for this and he’s not sure he even wants another child. Of course, he’ll _never_ abort the child or even give it up for adoption but two children is a lot of work. What would Ainsley think? It’s just been she and Harry for four years and now there’s a new man in her life _and_ a new baby. Harry’s biggest fear is that Ainsley will feel unloved and unwanted. On top of that inner turmoil, Harry’s is terrified of Louis’ reaction to the news. Who’s to say this won’t overwhelm him and he’ll run back into the fake arms of Elle because he can’t handle Harry’s hormones? Oh, God he’s going to be sick.

Harry flings his driver door open just in time for the contents of his breakfast to hit the asphalt. He heaves a couple times before he grabs the water bottle out of the center console and rinses out his mouth. He pours the rest of it on the ground to wash away his sick before he relaxes into his seat and closes his eyes. 

He still feels queasy but it’s not from the pregnancy. When he thinks he won’t upchuck again, he grabs his phone and sees five text messages and three missed calls from Louis. Harry sighs and sends Louis a vague message that he’s on his way to his house and will be there soon.

Louis responds almost immediately with a short response and a smiling emoticon and Harry prays Louis’ spirits stay high and happy after he tells him the news. 

Harry takes his time driving to Louis’ house. He sighs in relief when he realizes Elle has been gone for the last 3 weeks after Louis served her with their divorce papers. That was one conversation and confrontation Harry doesn’t want to relive. If it weren’t for Louis’ threat of throwing her arse in jail if Elle put hands on Harry, he’s certain he would have been mauled to death.

As Harry pulls into Louis’ gated complex, he thinks he’ll have a moment to gather himself before speaking to Louis but that quickly goes out the window when he rounds the corner and sees Louis standing on his porch and bouncing on the balls of his feet. Good God, he’s in love with a dork.

Louis meets Harry by the car by the time he pulls into the driveway and cuts the engine. Louis practically throws the door open and smiles giddily. He looks like he’s about to explode and Harry can’t help but laugh. “Weeeell?”

“Jesus, Lou, slow your roll,” Harry scolds playfully.

“You’re really laying the suspense on thick, aren’t ya?” Louis pouts.

“The results were positive. I’m seven or eight weeks pregnant,” Harry finally says. He stares at Louis to gauge his reaction and nearly works himself up into a panic attack when he suddenly can’t decipher his reaction or facial expressions. “Oh, God, it’s happening. You’re going to leave me to do this on my own again.”

Louis’ eyes widen when he sees his boyfriend start to work himself into a proper frenzy. “Oh, God, no no no. Haz, I’m ecstatic! You’re having my baby--our second baby. Everything’s going to be different this time, I promise.”

Harry lets out a shaky sigh and searches Louis’ expressions for anything other than happiness. All he finds is elation with the way Louis’ eyes crinkle and his smile so wide. 

“You promise?” Harry asks, voice barely above a whisper. “We’re in this together?”

Louis nods and crouches down in the doorway so he’s eye level with Harry. He holds both of Harry’s hands in his own and gives them a gentle squeeze. 

“We’re in this together.”

Fin

_Stay tuned for an epilogue :)_


	6. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry reminisces time and time again over the last few years and how extraordinarily happy he’s been being married to Louis and raising their children.

_8 Months Later_

_Harry must admit Ainsley’s a smart girl. Especially now when his water just broke on the linoleum floor in front of his daughter and she’s more concerned about her daddy than panicking in a way most five year olds would. He bites his lip when he feels the first of many contractions._

_“Daddy? Daddy, what’s wrong?” Ainsley asks, panic in her voice._

_Harry doesn’t want to alarm his daughter but he also doesn’t want to tell her everything is roses and daisies either. Then again, she’s only five and and he needs to put on a brave face._

_With a semi-painless smile, Harry nods and waddles to the kitchen table to sit down. “I’m okay, princess. Do you remember how papa and I taught you to use our phones?”_

_Ainsley beams, rivaling Louis’ smile and nods emphatically. “Uh huh!”_

_“That’s my girl. Will you…” Harry has to pause when the next contraction wracks through his body. He bites his lip and closes his eyes as he tries to breathe through the pain. “Will you get my phone from the living room and call papa?”_

_Ainsley knows something is wrong. Her daddies taught her to only use the phone in case one of them couldn’t get to it or if there was an emergency. When she sees her daddy’s face screw up in pain again it frightens her. She hurries into the living room to get her daddy’s phone and unlocks his phone with a swipe of her finger and taps at Louis’ contact._

_With Harry due any day, Louis has his phone attached to the hip. His heart drops when he sees Harry’s contact photo suddenly appear on his screen and answers immediately. “Harry?”_

_“Hi, Papa. Sometings wrong wif daddy. He keeps cwying!” Ainsley rushes out to say. She doesn’t know what’s happening and she’s on the verge of tears._

_Oh, God, Harry’s in labor, Louis’ certain of it. It’s the only reason Louis can think of as to why his daughter is calling him and not his fiance._

_“It’s okay, sweetheart, I promise. Your baby brother wants to meet you is all,” Louis says, trying to keep his five year-old calm._

_Ainsley gasps in excitement at the news that she’s finally meeting her baby brother but Louis’ internally panicking. His fiance and young daughter are home alone and he doesn’t know how long Harry’s been in labor or how soon the baby will be here. He shoots his boss a quick email that his fiance has gone into labor and doesn’t wait for a response before he’s gathering his belongings and snatches the keys off his desk._

_“Do you wanna talk to daddy?” Ainsley asks, her voice on the verge of breaking. This poor girl is terrified._

_“Yes, baby girl, lemme talk to daddy.”_

_There’s shuffling and muted words before Harry’s pained voice comes onto the line. “Lou…”_

_“Oh, Haz, are you alright? Are you in labor? Did your water break? What’s going on?” Louis fires at him, his own mind in disarray._

_“Relax, babe, you’re panicking worse than I am,” Harry giggles breathlessly, trying to make light of the hectic situation. “Yes, my water broke and I’ve had a few contractions since. I think this is the real deal, Lou. I think he’s ready.”_

_Just a couple weeks ago, Harry woke up with Braxton Hicks and he truly thought it their son was ready to enter the world. After calling Anne to watch Ainsley and Louis breaking a dozen traffic laws trying to get Harry to the hospital, both men were disappointed when Harry’s OBGYN told them it was a false alarm. He was barely dilated three centimeters._

_“I’m already on my way, H. Have you called your mum?”_

_“I haven’t. Can you? We only showed Ainsley how to call you and this pain is getting to be too much.”_

_“On it, babe, don’t worry. Have Ainsley play in her room until your mum gets there. It’ll keep some normalcy to all this.”_

_“Kay,” Harry whispers, crying out when this particular contraction is stronger than the previous ones. “Hurry, Lou. I don’t think Riot’s going to take his time.”_

_“I wouldn’t miss his birth for the world, babe.”_

Harry’s content with the way life’s turned out for him and Ainsley. For one thing, being Louis’ husband has its perks. Louis made Harry quit his job shortly after he started showing with Riot. He wanted Harry to be a stay at home dad to their children instead of working himself ragged. With Riot now two and Ainsley seven, he’s grateful Louis’ made him quit his job. Riot is exactly that... a riot. 

Harry giggles at how Riot originally got his name. When he was seven months along, Louis had made a remark that their son was a riot when the baby refused to let him sleep one night. With the constant tumbling and turning making him uncomfortable and having to pee every three seconds, a riot was exactly what this baby was.

Now, Riot William Tomlinson is barreling through their large home knocking over everything in his wake as he growls like a dinosaur.

“Riot!” Harry scolds. “Do you want a timeout?”

Riot pauses his destruction and whips around to see his daddy standing in the hallway with hands on his hips and giving him the knowing look. He stares at his daddy with wide green eyes and shakes his head. “Nooo!”

“Then you need to stop being a bad boy. You’re making a mess and daddy has to clean it all up.”

Riot pouts and toddles over to his daddy, burying his face in Harry’s knees. He immediately starts to cry and Harry sighs. For a little ball of energy, little things always set him off. Harry has to watch his tone ninety percent of the time so he doesn’t make his son cry.

Harry bends down and scoops up his son, swaying with him as he rubs his back. “Hey, no tears, bud. Daddy isn’t mad. You’re still my good boy.”

Riot finds solace in sucking his thumb as the swaying and crying fit lulls him into a deep slumber. It was his close to naptime anyway and it’s like clockwork everyday. Harry’s not sure he can do this a third time. Riot is a handful and Ainsley’s getting to the age where her brother is starting to annoy her. 

Ainsley’s almost eight and she’s got a little group of friends she’s always hanging out with. If she’s not at one of their houses for slumber parties, Harry’s hosting them here. So, he’s not sure she’ll be happy once he tells her the news she’s going to have another sibling.

It’s Louis’ opinion that mostly matters. If Louis’ reaction from Riot’s birth is anything to go by, he’s certain he’s going to be equally elated that they’re on baby number three. The happy tears and dozens of kisses Harry received from Louis the moment Riot was placed on his chest is enough confirmation that this is what Louis wants; a man who loves him to the ends of the earth and little kiddos to chase around their backyard. 

Harry reminisces time and time again over the last few years and how extraordinarily happy he’s been being married to Louis and raising their children. He’s not going to give this up for the world and with a third on the way, he believes he’s ready for whatever obstacles come his way. He knows he has his husband right by his side. Harry’s over the moon he gave Louis that second chance two years ago. Who’s to say where he may be now if he didn’t?

Life works in mysterious ways and fate has a tricky way of rearing its head. Harry doesn’t know what it’s store for him five, even ten years down the road but he _does_ know, it’ll be something to reminisce about.

_Thank you for reading. You all keep me going. :)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A special thanks to everyone who's kudos'd, read, and commented! :D You guys keep me going!


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